


Lean On Me

by lavenderlotion



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Arguing, Established Relationship, Grief/Mourning, M/M, Making Up, POV Alternating
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-10-30
Updated: 2015-10-30
Packaged: 2021-02-19 05:09:50
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,937
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22039018
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lavenderlotion/pseuds/lavenderlotion
Summary: “I really freaking love you. But you’ve got to stop doing this. I know you, better than anyone else in the world, okay? I’m here for you, and I’m always going to be. We can face this together.”
Relationships: Derek Hale/Stiles Stilinski
Comments: 8
Kudos: 68





	Lean On Me

**Author's Note:**

> Wrote this for a class project lmao

“Oh my god!” He roared, stomping his feet in a very childish manner. Honestly, Stiles didn’t really care. “I cannot _believe_ that you’re doing this!”

“Look, it really isn’t that big of a deal,” Derek said once again, getting even more on Stiles’ nerves. Why couldn’t Derek just see this the way Stiles did?

“Not a big deal!? This is a _huge_ deal, Derek! In case you had forgotten we-”

“Of course I have not forgotten,” Derek tried once more. 

Stiles was so frustrated. Why couldn’t Derek just see how this whole situation made Stiles feel?

“- live together and you cannot be making major, life changing decisions without consulting me first! You need to lean on me, Derek!” Dear god, Stiles thought. It was like dating a moody teenager. Derek’s way of dealing with his emotions was to just not, and that was not okay with Stiles. Stiles was fuming, in fact if he was a cartoon, he was fairly certain his hair would be made of fire and steam would be shooting out of his ears. It was hard living with someone, something Stiles found increasingly difficult to do. “Like, I am _so_ mad!”

Stiles wished he had the option of storming out the front door to drive home in a fit of anger and short breaths and talking to himself. All he needed was to chill for a few hours, a day at the most. Derek was better at being calm, which was surprising given his past. Despite what he had been through he was almost always the more rational one. It was times like these when their 5 year age gap was really the most evident. Stiles how no idea how Derek could be so calm given the situation. It was infuriating to Stiles. Things like this were supposed to _affect_ people. They were supposed to make you _feel_ things. You were not supposed to just brush off the death of your uncle like it’s no big deal, at least that’s what Stiles thought.

“Stiles, you know how I feel about Peter. He wasn’t a good man, okay? He was a horrible person who did horrible things and I don’t feel any different now that he’s dead.”

Stiles wasn’t sure why, but for some reason this irritated him even more. Family is family, no matter what. Peter was never a good person to Derek, he didn’t treat him well, and Stiles knew that, but he also knew that Peter had no other family and letting his body rot away in the morgue (or whatever it is that happened to bodies that the family didn’t want) was not the right thing to do.

“Please, Derek. Just do _something_!”

“This isn't like your mom and it’s not like Scott’s dad! Peter was _not_ my Uncle, not in my eyes,” Derek roared, voice booming through their small apartment. Stiles had never been afraid of Derek he had no reason to be. Especially now when Stiles knew that despite his intimidating stature Derek had a very soft heart. That didn't mean that Stiles was never intimidated by Derek. Stiles had never been a ‘big guy’. Throughout his life he had been relatively skinny, sarcasm and humour being his only defence during the torturous trials of high school. He was also a ‘geek’ as some would say, making him an even easier target for other kids who were ‘jocks’ and ‘cool kids’ to tease. Derek was the opposite of Stiles. He was never a bully but he definitely fit the mold of one. He was tall with broad shoulders and full eyebrows. His face was covered in a blanket of scruff which when paired with his signature leather jacket gave him a very intimidating ‘don’t mess with me’ look. 

“Look Stiles, this is more complicated than you can imagine,” Derek said, a condescending tone to his voice.

Now Stiles was upset. He may have been the younger one in the relationship but that did not mean he was immature. In fact he was far from it. Stiles did not have a regular childhood so he had to grow up fast, maturing before many of his friends did. 

“I am _not_ in the mood for any of your condescending bullshit! When we got into this relationship we agreed that we were equals, that you aren’t better than me just because you are older!” Stiles was fuming. He was fairly secure in himself and in his relationship, but every now and then little bursts of insecurity would creep up under his skin. He did his best to reassure himself, but during times like these when they fought, it was even harder to convince himself that Derek wanted to be with him. “Look Derek, I know how ‘complicated’ this all is! Fuck, I know. But you need to talk to me!”

“I _am_ talking to you!” Derek was full on shouting at this point. Stiles felt his heartbeat quicken and his hands begin to quiver. Derek’s voice was a loud, full sound that could bend people to his will if ever used to do so. “I am trying to tell you how I feel and what’s going on but you’re _not_ listening to me! This is _my_ family, it's _my_ uncle that we are talking about, this is _my_ life.”

“I thought it was our life, Derek,” Stiles said, his voice small and beginning to quiver. Fuck, he thought. Stiles hated to feel weak, to feel young and inferior and that’s how he felt now. Stiles could see a repertoire of emotions flash across Derek’s face, anger, hurt, regret. After this long together Stiles had gotten pretty good at reading Derek’s face. 

Stiles wasn’t able to say anything else after that, too scared that his voice would betray him and crack again. He needed time to think, time to be on his own. So he did what he does best, he ran. Stiles hadn’t run away from anything since getting together with Derek, but now everything seemed so impossible and Stiles felt like he was drowning in himself. How were they supposed to share their life when Derek didn’t want to. It was clear, after all, that Derek didn’t want to include Stiles in the decision making. Slamming their door on the way out, Stiles flew down the stairs, wanting to get away as quickly as he could. 

The cold hit him like a wall. With just a graphic T and a light flannel, Stiles was not prepared for the mid-November chill. He looked around quickly, trying to orient himself, not really sure what to do now. His home was with Derek now, in their little apartment above their flower shop. He could try going home, back to his child house and seeing his dad, but he wasn’t really up for the two hour drive. The next place that came to mind was Scott’s apartment. Scott was his best friend and had been since they were four. Scott was his go to, and when Stiles moved to New York, Scott came with him, because Stiles was also Scott’s go to.

Stiles knew where the spare key was, and by the time he got into Scott’s apartment he couldn’t stop crying. Tears soaked his cheeks, dripped off his chin and onto his shirt. His fingers were long since numb and he was fairly certain his eyelashes were frozen together. Stiles was also pretty sure he had snot dripping from his nose, definitely not attractive. He had gotten a few strange looks on his walk here, and the older man in the elevator looked incredibly uncomfortable when Stiles started crying next to him, but Stiles couldn’t bring himself to care. Frankly he felt like shit and he was cold, so screw other people. Luckily Scott was not home yet, giving Stiles a chance to calm down and get a hold of himself before meeting with his best friend. After sending out a quick text explaining what had happened and why Stiles would be there, he hopped in the shower letting the hot water wash away the cold. The water also helped to calm his jumbled emotions, allowing himself to fully analyse what had happened.

God, he had overreacted. Thinking back on it, Stiles knew he had not acted mature at all. Here Derek was, after just receiving more devastating, life shattering news, and Stiles made it all about himself. Obviously Derek didn’t want to talk about it right then, hell, Stiles wouldn’t want to either. Stiles knew how Derek handled things, so he also knew that in a day or two Derek would have been ready to open up and share, because that’s how Derek worked. Stiles had severely fucked up, and he really wished he had realized it sooner.

* * *

Derek wasn’t sure how it all happened, how his calm, relaxing morning turned into such a shit storm. All was fine until he answered the door. It was a cop, or maybe a detective. He wasn’t sure, and honestly didn’t really care. The words were hard to listen to, maybe because he had waited so long to hear them? He hadn’t felt happy at the news, but he hadn’t felt sad either. Honestly Derek wasn’t sure how he felt, of if he felt anything. He could hear the water running from Stiles’ shower, he could even hear Stiles humming along to some song playing from his phone. He could hear his own heart beating heavily in his ears. It was as if he had become hypersensitive and he was not quite sure why that was. Derek wasn’t sure why this news was so hard for him to hear. The detective had to wave his hand in front of Derek’s face to finally get his attention. He thanked the officer, closing the door pretty much in his face. It’s not like Peter had been a good uncle, right? He had screwed Derek over to many times to count. It wasn’t until Stiles found him standing at the front door, beads of water still clinging to Stiles’ hair, that Derek snapped out of whatever trance he had been in. 

Derek wasn’t sure why, but it seemed that his first reaction was to push things away, pretend he wasn’t affected by what was going on. He knew this was the reason Stiles got so upset. Peter had been a horrible uncle but that didn’t mean Derek shouldn’t be affected by his death. In fact Derek was very affected by his death. Peter had been Derek’s only surviving family member, and to lose him was like losing his family all over again. That wasn’t something Derek ever wanted to feel.

So instead of talking through his feelings with his partner like a normal adult would have done, he shrunk into himself, pretending like he was hard and emotionless and nothing bothered him. That’s how he had to act growing up. You can’t show emotion in foster care, or else they eat you alive. Derek didn’t have it easy growing up, constantly moving from youth shelter to youth shelter, never staying in one place for too long until he was finally out of the system. He wanted Stiles to know how he felt, but old habits die hard and Derek just wasn’t good at being open with someone. Stiles, on the other hand, was like an open book. Derek always knew what he was thinking or how he was feeling because Stiles didn’t try to hide it. He was secure enough in himself that he didn’t need to hide how he felt, especially in a relationship. Even back when Stiles and Derek first became friends Derek found Stiles very easy to read. Derek wanted to be that for Stiles, to be an open book that his partner could read without worry. He hated that he wasn’t.

When Stiles stormed out Derek knew where he was going. He knew that Stiles needed his time. He needed to cool down. One thing about Stiles is that he is quick to overreact, always needing his own time to cool off after working himself up. Derek was the opposite. He never acted without thinking, and he tried his best not to let the little things bother him. Even at times like this he pushed his emotions away, opting to act closed off and as if nothing ever bothered him instead of facing the truth. He would push things off, not letting himself deal with his feelings until they eventually became too much for him to handle. This wasn’t a good way to deal with things, either.

The walk to Scott’s apartment wasn’t very far as he only lived a few blocks down from Derek and Stiles’ shop. Derek used the cool morning air to clear his head, letting the breeze blow away his confused thoughts which allowed him to think clearer. He was going to be honest, he thought to himself. He had to be honest at some point. He had talked to Stiles about this in the past. Late night discussion back when there were first falling in love with each other, still learning all the parts of each other. He knew all of Stiles’ insecurities, and Stiles knew all of his. Derek was constantly trying to be a better person, to look better and to act nicer and to be kinder always striving to the best he could be. Derek was so scared Stiles was going to leave him. He was so terrified of the day when Stiles finally realized just how much better off he would be without Derek in his life. This idea scared him even more than losing his family had. 

Scott lived in an apartment complex with his girlfriend, and Derek considered ringing the buzzer. Honestly there was no point, the door of the complex was always propped open with someone's shoe. The landlady either didn’t know or didn’t care, but either way it was convenient for Derek. Derek wasn’t even sure if Scott would let him in. After taking the elevator up to Scott’s floor he reached into the flower pot that sat adjacent to Scott’s apartment door. When Derek pushed open the door, he heard the shower running and figured Scott was letting Stiles cool down and think. Derek knew that Stiles liked to do that best in the shower. He called out Scott’s name, waiting for an answer before entering the apartment. When he heard nothing he walked in, after all he had spent countless nights here. Stiles would occasionally disappear for a week, camping out in Scott’s apartment. Derek figured he would just sit and wait for Stiles to be done, or for Scott to come into the living room.

Scott never did come out though, and eventually the shower turned off, and he heard Stiles softly curse and mutter about how Derek caused him to be all forgetful and not bring a change of clothes. A moment or two later Derek was faced with an almost naked Stiles standing in front of him, a scowl on his face and his eyebrows turning up in surprise, somehow doing both simultaneously. 

“Look, I know what you are going to sa-” 

“Derek you are such a fucking idiot. Look, babe, I love you.” 

Derek wasn’t expecting that, he wasn’t expecting that at all. He tried to keep his mouth from falling open in shock, but he just too much in shock for that. “I really freaking love you. But you’ve got to stop doing this. I know you, better than anyone else in the world, okay? I’m here for you, and I’m always going to be. We can face this together.”

In that moment Derek was beyond thankful for Stiles. Stiles just got him, as if they were meant to be together, a concept that Derek could hardly fathom before meeting Stiles. Somehow Stiles had known exactly what to say to make Derek feel better, and Derek hoped against hope that he would never lose this man. He just prayed he knew the right words as well.

“Stiles, you were right. I love you, and that’s really hard for me to do.” Taking a breath Derek prepared to let himself go, and surprisingly, it was easier than he thought. “You are my everything, the only family I have left. I never want to lose you. I know I’m hard headed sometimes, but that’s just who I am. I’m not good with talking about my feelings, but I want to be.

“Dude, you really need to get your shit together okay? Don’t worry though, I’ll help you.” Stiles said, a smile spreading across his face. Something about that made sense to Derek. It was like nothing could ever go wrong again. He looked at Stiles, half naked, crying and also smiling like a madman and he just couldn’t help himself. 

Stiles held Derek when he started crying, letting the larger of the two fall into his arms, literally. Stiles supported Derek for a while, but eventually they both melted into a crying mess on the floor, Stiles’ towel hardly hanging on to his waist. Stiles knew what Derek was crying about. He was crying over his uncle, but he also crying because he was happy. And Derek knew why Stiles was crying. He was crying because Derek was hurt, but also because he was happy. They were happy because they had each other, and nothing could come between them. They knew they could always lean on each other. The lived pretty darn happily ever after after that, usually only arguing about what to make for dinner.

**Author's Note:**

> come say hi to me on [tumblr](https://lavender-lotion.tumblr.com/)!  
> comments and kudos are much appreciated!


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